When you have to say NO to your Boss…..Tips

As we grow in IT , we develop our own individuality and thinking, there will be instances to debate your point with peers and Boss. Saying no to your Boss is quite tricky, our colleagues might have advised against it countless times, every bone in our body might say that you shouldn’t do it and you might try to avoid it with utter sincerity but at some point during your office life, circumstances are such that saying No to your boss becomes absolutely unavoidable.

You might have the most rational explanations for turning down instructions from your boss but unless you put forth your denial in a proper way, it is highly unlikely that you can wriggle out this situation without harming your reputation.

Better take you case and put your point for debate, than denying the instructions later stage denting your repute.

Use the following tips to ensure your rational logic doesn’t make a serious dent in your reputation with the boss:

Present yourself like a Victim! getting most effected

Try to look slightly helpless when putting across your reason or excuse for turning down the boss’s instructions. For these few moments, shed the confidence in your strut. Don’t carry yourself into the boss’ cabin with the usual air of confidence that you exude at work. This is one of the rare situations in a workplace when looking vulnerable is more likely to help. If you can act a bit, it would be of great help. Try to look a bit dejected, as if this moment is a burden on your soul and is weighing you mdown. Try to exude the helplessness associated with a victim. Looking victimized means that any excuse/reason you will put across will seem more convincing.

Choose your moment

Bosses are like any other person at work, i.e. they are likely to have bad days where anything that seems to challenge their authority or sensibilities can lead to an outburst. Thus, be guarded in picking the day and the moment when you confront your boss.

Try not to interfere between meetings or when the boss is busy on the phone or some other work. Try to gauge the boss’ mood. Search for a moment when the boss looks a bit relaxed and doesn’t exude that typical killer looks that he/she is known to carry.

It is better to choose a time which assures that the boss isn't stressed or apprehensive. This includes the period just after a tea break or after a celebration in the office.

Drown your Defiance

You can be extremely polite and respectful even when saying No to somebody and this is particularly applicable when communicating with the boss. Ensure that your choice of words doesn’t border upon starting an argument. It shouldn’t seem like you are defying the boss’ authority.

The aim should be to emerge from this situation with your dignity and reputation intact. So, don’t engage the boss in an argument. Don’t try to present so many reasons that the boss’ decision-making ability is challenged. Stress your reason for saying No in a clear voice not with emotional tone . You can be a bit assertive too but ensure that you choose a low-pitch tone that doesn’t engage any kind of confrontation.

Use your appearance to win sympathy with the Boss

If you have the liberty of planning the moment when you are going to refuse your boss, ensure that you wear dull, sober-colored clothes. It is better to be devoid any party-like accessories that otherwise seem to get you lots of compliments at work. In fact, a one or two-day stubble, is ideal to be worn for this situation, so plan accordingly.

Being prepared can save you the Day

Talk to yourself before your approach the boss. Make yourself understand that this could have implications like the boss getting angered and grilling you or it could be surprisingly, trouble-free. This will help you to cope with the situation in case the boss unleashes a verbal assault on you. Be on your safe zone, Being prepared ensures that such offensiveness will not challenge your tolerance and you won’t lose your anger.

Negotiating at work: Tips

Like any other skill, negotiation requires learning and practice. The better prepared you are with factual data before heading into a negotiation, the more effective you will be.

In an office, as in a war, negotiation is won much before the first battle is ever fought. But unlike in a war, successful negotiation has both parties walking away as winners. What is negotiation at work? It's the skill of reaching an agreement, be it with the boss and colleagues in office, or clients and vendors outside the organisation. In the first part of this sub-series on negotiation, we deal with the latter.

Like any other skill, negotiation requires learning and practice. The key issues often boil down to reaching an agreement that is mutually beneficial and seeking a working relationship that permits the benefits to flow. The following diagram gives 5 Qtrs of negotiation areas.

This process can be made profitable and enjoyable for all concerned if some basic steps are followed. The first step is the same as for any other process-preparation. The better prepared you are with factual data before heading into a negotiation, the more effective you will be.

Thereafter, the most important requirement is to honestly, logically and accurately identify the real needs and goals. Though the most obviously stated need is money, it can be a proxy for other physical or more refined needs (shelter, reputation, self-esteem). In the case of a vendor/client, people are often simply seeking understanding and attention rather than money.

Once you prioritise the needs of both parties, you can plan towards a mutually advantageous solution, wherein you can give away low-ranked needs in return for high-priority ones. Also, identify the stakeholders whose interests or needs are affected by the outcome of the agreement or negotiation. If you can -list out multiple stakeholders and their various interests, you are probably analysing well. Use the matching needs to come up with multiple solutions that may work.

Carry your analysis into the communication with the negotiating party. The communication process is the second critical step in arriving at an agreement. It is important to realise that the words used, emotions, as well as the non-verbal attitude, will have an impact on people, and, hence, on the outcome. Listen with an open mind, focus on receiving and communicating with maximum clarity, and maintain sufficient emotional distance in order to be successful. Simultaneously, you can continue to receive factual data, with both parties  following the give-and-take principle, and building trust gradually. It is important to have persistence and respect for the other person in order to be successful.

Finally, remember that you should care for the outcome, but not too much. You can negotiate well only if you have the ability to walk away from an unfavorable agreement. To build this strength, create a credible alternative to failure. So, a successful salesperson, for instance, can negotiate the best deals on his products if he has a potential back-up customer. You should also factor in the fallback options for the other side. If you do this, it will be clear that the final agreement will necessarily fall between the back-up options of the parties concerned. However, do not exercise your option to walk away; make your final offer and let the other person go first-if need be.

While negotiating with a client/vendor, enter the discussion with a win-win mindset. Understand that both the parties need to walk away with gains. So, if you are looking for a higher price, perhaps your client wants the peace of mind that comes with an extended warranty. If you think of it as a win-lose deal, you stand to lose both the deal and the working relationship. Irrespective of the outcome, do not take words, requests or denials personally.

A lost deal does not mean that you have failed. It simply implies that at that moment, the client could not afford to accept your offer. Do, however, take time to help the client understand what he stands to gain from your offer. Listen carefully to make sure you understand what he really wants.

Also remember never to lose your cool or emotions. Your friends may accept you as you are, but your clients could run scared. Try and be the first to make an offer. It will help anchor the client to your view and the final agreement is more likely to end closer to your proposal. Do not compromise on your ethical standards. Most clients/vendors would be happy to work where they perceive the other person to be fair. While the client has the right to ask and know before paying, both parties are entitled to take time to think through their reactions.

At the end of the day, every interaction with a client/vendor teaches us something new that adds to our negotiation experience. It is a skill that takes years to master. Know that negotiation with clients is often focused on money. Add to it the amorphous nature of relationships and negotiations can become very complex.

Reproduced from  www.businesstoday.in